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 GWTW's Scarlett O'Hara  Downton Abbey's Lady Mary My current fascination with Masterpiece Classic’s Downton Abbey is not unlike the fascination I have for Gone With The Wind. In fact, Downton Abbey itself is not unlike Gone With The Wind. I often hear Downton compared to Upstairs, Downstairs, but its real predecessor is GWTW.
Start with the over-arching themes: in each, a way of life faces change and potential extinction. Are we talking about the British aristocracy at the dawn of the 20th century or the plantation owners of the Confederate South? Either way, it’s all the same.
The patriarchs of each family, Lord Grantham in Downton and Gerald O’Hara in GWTW, express their love for their way of life and their homes. Each have difficulty adjusting after the war.
Gerald O’Hara says, “Do you mean to tell me, Katie Scarlett O’Hara, that Tara, that land doesn’t mean anything to you? Why, land is the only thing in the world worth workin’ for, worth fightin’ for, worth dyin’ for, because it’s the only thing that lasts.”
Lord Grantham says, “My fortune is the work of others who laboured to build a great dynasty. Do I have the right to destroy their work or impoverish that dynasty? I am a custodian, my dear, not an owner. I must strive to be worthy of the task I’ve been set.”
Between Me and My Sister
Each man has three daughters remarkably similar in character. Scarlett, Suellen, Careen equals Mary, Edith and Sybil.
The eldest is beautiful and headstrong. She disregards her reputation to the horror of her family. The middle girl is less attractive and bitter and can’t get a beau. The youngest is serene and otherworldly. Which set of sisters am I describing? See what I mean?
The second common theme is the portrayal of Have-Nots in relation to the Haves. In Downton Abbey, the household servants are not slaves, but they live vicariously through the family. In the drawing room, the family speaks of “sacking” them, but in private, the family forms friendships—unequal—but friendships nonetheless. The family bestows kind acts on the servants as if the workers are their children.
It is easy to draw comparisons of Mammy’s relationship with Scarlett to the butler Carson’s relationship with Mary. (And Rhett’s last name is even Butler . . . ) Continue reading Gone with the Downton Abbey
 Phil's Evil Twin The Cast
A new season and The Amazing Race trots out a new cast: eleven teams, including all the requisite stereotypes.
The look-alike blondes look so much alike this time, they are twins. The blonde alternatives, the brunettes, are former Las Vegas show girls who look like Kardashians. Last season, they were poker players. See brunettes have to be just a little more than sexy.
The producers like to include teams with athletic feats on their resumes. Andy and Tommy, happy-go-lucky stoner-types, are Olympic snowboarders. They will remind you of Season 9′s game winning hippies.
The former NFL star and his wife promise to play aggressively while keeping his NFL history quiet. You know that won’t stay quiet.
This season’s notorious pair and the show’s biggest catch is former Survivor players. Again. Meet the new Rob and Amber—Ethan and Jenna. But Ethan and Jenna each actually won Survivor. But Ethan will be a more sympathetic character than scheming Rob. Ethan is also a cancer survivor.
Who will be this season’s Bickersons? Each dating couple drop a hint in their introductions that it might be them. Ernie, who is engaged to Cindi, calls her a control freak. Cindi admits it and says she will not change.
Sandy shoots Jeremy a look when he says he wants to kick the tires before the makes their relationship permanent.
The Start
Eleven teams line up in front of the Hsi Lai Temple, Los Angeles and exude the foolish confidence racers do before the stress of jet lag and challenges rattle them.
Phil presents them with a word puzzle to solve in a awkward and needlessly complex challenge. No one is solving the puzzle, just grabbing and flashing umbrellas at Phil. I don’t think any team actually solved the puzzle, learning that their first destination is Taipei, Taiwan only when Phil appears as they start their cars.
One of the showgirls, Kaylani, drops her passport at the gas station. Looks like they are out before they even get off the ground. How can that happen? Just when you believe it really will, two dudes from the gas station show up at LAX with the passport. Really?
I always root for the old couple to turn in a decent performance. No one ever expects them to win, but I don’t want them to embarrass themselves. This season’s grandparents really embarrass themselves.
The Amazing Race aired two episodes back-to-back last night. Promoted as a two-hour finale, the two episodes paired together feel deflating. A mere commercial break after the fourth team is eliminated, the final three are off and running for the million-dollar prize.
Where’s my week to ponder which team should win? Especially this season, when my favorites are gone and so are the obnoxious teams.
Actually, were there any obnoxious teams in Amazing Race 18? I can think of two annoying teams, but no team was outright obnoxious as in past seasons. Remember Rob/Amber and Myrna/Schmyrna? Who remembers the family from New Jersey?
Two episodes are too much to absorb at once. There was a lot of absorption going on last night—the racers got plenty wet, both in Rio De Janeiro and the final destination, Miami.
Rio was the end of the race for Zev and Justin. The Rio challenges seemed almost designed to make them lose.
 Rio Dance Judge Gives Sympathy Pass First, Zev must learn the Samba and lead a dancing parade to get through the Roadblock. Guess how well that went?
All I can say is Zev tried hard—but like he himself said—he dances like a white boy. On his third attempt, the dance judge gives him a sympathy Sim (“yes” in Portuguese). By then, the other three teams are off with their clues. I am sad to see Zev and Justin go from first place to last because of an extra left foot.
Teams receive a painful Brazilian wax job and though I couldn’t laugh at Zev’s dancing, I could laugh at the waxing. In the world of comedy, pain is funnier than humiliation. Poor Zev and Justin! As the hairiest team, they suffered the most at the hands of the hard-hearted waxers.
The pain of the dancing and waxing must have caused them to select the bikini-selling option in the Detour. (Never, ever select the selling option of a Detour!) Maybe the image of thong bikini-clad women was irresistible to the lads. At home, we just saw a lot of blurred butts.
Selling bikinis to people already wearing bikinis is like going car to car selling automobiles. Goodbye, Zev and Justin.
Final Lap In Miami
Now it’s Mallory/Gary, Flight Time/Big Easy and Kisha/Jen racing for the million dollars. I like all three teams, so I don’t care who wins.
 Miami Mermaids Kisha and Jen remark that they have not won a single leg. Don’t feel bad about that, ladies. The first-place finishers in each leg need to cut Uncle Sam in on their cars and trips. Your million dollars is cold hard cash. Congratulations!
 St Bernard at the Pit Stop Majestic views of Switzerland’s Matterhorn and the surrounding town of Zermatt make this episode one of the most visually stunning.
Flying in helicopters above the Matterhorn, Zev pipes in about the mountain being named after the ride in Disneyland. That’s where I first heard of the Matterhorn too, Zev.
Zev/Justin and Mallory/Gary select the wrong side of the Detour, electing to “Search” instead of “Rescue.” On paper, “Search” sounds easier, but the teams must dig a dummy out of a snowy grave. The dummy appears to be buried at least six feet under.
Both teams dig and grunt and pull their dummies out in two pieces. Not much of a rescue.
Gary and Mallory perform the task in half the time of Zev and Justin. It looks like this Detour is going to put Zev and Justin out of the race.
Tonight’s race contains one of the most fun Roadblocks. At Le Petit Cervin, one team member must paint a Travelocity Gnome with colored chocolate and freeze the mold. Then they fill the mold with chocolate and bury the creation outside in the snow for thirty minutes.
The other team member gets to watch and pop chocolates. Tempers flare up when somebody grabs the wrong mold from the freezer. But once the sugar kicks in, Big Easy and Kisha indulge in some playful candy-ass banter. They continue the little flirtation I noticed earlier.
Zev nabs the comic lines in this leg. When the Swiss Chocolatier tells him his Gnome is getting full of chocolate, Zev says, “Thanks, Captain Obvious.”
Flight Time and Kynt go for the physical comedy. Flight Time does a hip swirling dance when he is supposed to be swirling the body of the chocolate Gnome. Kynt does some Charlie Chaplain-esque mockery of Big Easy.
Kynt and Vyxsin take their bickering to new heights. Kynt is constantly whining (“Vyxsin, put my hood up!) and she keeps telling him to wipe his nose. They blame each other for mistakes and they make the biggest mistake of all—not reading the clue word for word. This will cost them the game.
They take a taxi to the Pit Stop when the clue instructs them to travel “on foot.” The thirty minute penalty gives Zev and Justin enough time to catch up and hit the mat before Kynt/Vyxsin’s penalty is up. When Phil tells Zev and Justin the news with his usual dramatic pause, Zev says, “I’ll take it!”
Kynt and Vyxsin’s time has been up for a couple of episodes and I am not sorry to see them go. I watched their relationship deteriorate more each leg. After their elimination, once the dating couple thaws out and fixes their hair and makeup, they are a lovey-dovey again.
But Vyxsin calls Kynt her “best friend” and that makes me wonder if their romantic relationship is over.
The cowboys Jet and Cord are eliminated from the Amazing Race tonight (moment of silence, please). They are unable to recover from a mistake in kilometer calculation driving a motor bike down the length of Lichtenstein.
As much as the cowboys were liked by the other racers, Jet and Cord’s history of coming from behind put fear in the the other racers’ hearts.
The other racers’ ally to eliminate the strongest competition. Working together in varying degrees to find their way to the bottom of Lichtenstein on a motor bike, the teams give each other the answer (22 kilometers).
Sharing puzzle answers goes beyond the standard conventions of alliances, though it is not unprecendented in this race. Zev and Justin gave a puzzle solution to Flight Time and Big Easy early on, mostly out of hero worship of the Harlem Globetrotters.
Zev and Justin ride a wave of confidence as they log their fourth first place finish. Zev takes the reigns from team leader Justin this leg, pushing him to finish the pot of cheese fondue after just one bout of vomiting. I said this last week—beware of easy-sounding food challenges. Kisha and Jen are the only other team to attempt the fondue, but give up on it after only a few minutes and a few rich bites.
Zev hits the mat in front of host Phil with the fondue pot on his head, cracking every fondue pun he can think of, like “I’m only in it for the fondue of it.” Yes, the puns get worse.
Kynt and Vyxsin vow not to fight, but they are almost obliged to take the mantle of the Bickersons since they are the only dating couple left in the race. I am losing interest in them and I had hoped this was their time to exit.
My allegiance now lies with Flight Time and Big Easy. Why the band-aid on your head, Big Easy? Did it bring you luck and you just can’t take it off?
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